Little Kiwi and Bauhaus

Little Kiwi and Bauhaus
A Boy and His Dog

Friday, 10 October 2008

Relics of the Past

Ok, so I found this old picture of me, from when I was like 20 years old, and I totally busted a gut laughing at it. Ohhh, little young me. Little Young Me with my angsty pre-emo love for Bowie lyrics and ninth-grade artschool attempts at visual representation of inner conflict.
Those were simpler times. Times so simple that I used to believe this pic was 'deep'.

It aint. But it sure is funny.

Behold, youth.

Thursday, 9 October 2008

Now I Remember Why I Gave Up Dancing....

So You Think You Can Dance: Canada

Where to begin, oh where to begin..... Blake McGrath, the judge? Irritating beyond belief. Why is he always dressed like a background dancer from a 2000-era episode of (the American) Queer as Folk? Stupid chest-exposing vests that show he has....a tat of a chain? And a stupid generic arm-band tat that just screams "I'm from small town Ontario!"

Gag. GAAAAAAAAG. puke. gag and then puke. ugh. And did you see the towel around his neck? It was covered in beige makeup. Like, he's so completely made up that when he mops his brow layer upon layer of MAC comes off. BLARRRRRRRRRRF!

And then there was some boy from the prairies, whose name I can't remember.
Black hair. Blue eyes. Gayest Eyebrows Ever. And lips that I'm sure he's proud of, but to me just evoke horrid visions of Lisa Rinna (go ahead. Google her).

And then he opens his mouth to speak....
"I know that looks can only take you so far. I'm going to show the judges that there's more to me than just a face..." Oh, I get it.  You believe that what you see in the mirror is the worldwide definition of "HOT".  You believe you are the Gold Standard for "Hot". I don't. My friends don't. Sorry. My best friend and I were HOWLING with laughter at his soundbite. We even gave you a nickname!  Lipsy Bosomworth!  Like....maybe you were the hottest shit out in the prairies, but need a WAKE UP CALL! Stop waxing your fucking eyebrows, it makes it seem like you wish you had a vagine. A HUGE vagine.

It's bad enough that Blake thinks he's supersexworld incarnate (debatable!) but to also have some dancerboy rambling on about how he knows he has to be more than just "hot"....ugh. Puh-LEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEZE.

I'm not even going to get into the whole thing about how "hot" is subjective, instead I'll just pretend that my opinion, and not theirs, is canon, and suggest that perhaps a Manitoba 10 is more like an Ontario 5. Or something. You know what I mean.

Oh well, just felt like letting you all know that I'm not buying into the douchebaggery of SYTYCD Canada. I promise to blog about something I love sometime soon.

For real.

Little Kiwi Loves Bauhaus

Little Kiwi Loves Bauhaus
Good Dog!